The Myth, The Legend, The Reality of………Projectile Poop

My former coworker had told me about it, but he was the only parent who I heard say something like that. Plus, I’d changed more than enough diapers of cousins growing up in my household and didn’t remember anything like that ever happening.

I took his words as a myth. Maybe it was just his kid. Maybe it’s a one in a million thing that happens. My daughter never did it, so clearly it wasn’t a common thing. Right?

The Myth Projectile Poop

The Myth Becomes Reality

Well let me tell you. It wasn’t a myth. Projectile poop is a real thing. I experienced it for the first time this morning. And when I tell you it was an unforgettable experience, trust and believe that I will never doubt any parent who tells me something that hasn’t come to past with my own kids………..yet!!

Here’s what happened…………….

Sleepless Nights with a Newborn

My son had just woken up from a less than two hour nap. I was still half asleep because I hardly got any rest from the time I put him down. Then, on top of that, I had to be up in about an hour to start getting my other child ready for school. I tried to be quick.

I knew he wanted milk, a diaper change, and pat on the back, back to sleep.

He drank his milk like a champ, then made noise we’ve all grown familiar with: the diaper dump.

Great, I thought. Now I can change him quick and get him back to sleep to at least get 20 good minutes of rest.

I put him on the changer, grabbed wipes and a diaper and went to work. I cleaned his butt and was preparing to put on the clean diaper when I saw it. A brown line had shot out of his rear end towards me.

What in the World Was That

I acted quickly.

I grabbed the old diaper and put it in the way that the sharp shooter was headed. I was surprised at my reflexes since I was still in a sleep daze.

I had done it though. I managed to catch the projectile poop shooting from my son’s rear end before it hit the floor or me.

I turned on the light in his room. (Yea, my sleep deprived self caught all that action in the dark too. There is really a thing to this #MomInstincts.) In the light, I assessed the mess, cleaned up my son and put on a new diaper.

Of course, there was a little spillage on the changing table, but the majority of it hit the diaper. Let me tell you, I was more alert after that.

I didn’t even have to change his clothes. I had done a good job of keeping the mess to a small area.

This early morning was a win. And though I may not have gotten my 20 minutes of sleep that I wanted to catch before I had to deal with two woke kiddos, I had been up against the myth of the projectile poop and won.

Victory For Me.

Projectile Poop – 0

Mom – 1

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Have you ever experienced projectile poop or any other parenting event that you thought was just a myth? Let me know in the comments your parenting myth turned reality story.

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